There is something deliciously familiar about my husband.
Before you think I might give you TMI, let me explain. We were high school sweethearts that went to different schools. Our lives intersected in band. He, being the cute guy who was the first chair clarinet and me being the third. We became instant BBF (Band Best Friends) and started dating about 2 years later. We have been married for 35 years and have been making beautiful music ever since. The familiarity of him is like a well-loved blanket.
Warm. Reassuring. Comfortable. Protective. My safe place.
There is a cumulative oneness that develops in a long and happy marriage. After all the years of life events, I have grown accustomed to how he will respond to certain things. What he likes, what he dislikes, what breathes life into him and what drains him. And frankly, this familiarity isn’t dull but rather calming. Like a favorite sweater or pair of jeans. I know what to expect, and I derive GREAT joy from the fulfilled expectation. But, there is something recently that has surprised me.
Husband and Wife Bible Studies
Over the last three and half decades we have tried to be in the Word together.
I mean we REALLY tried.
Frankly, I think we have done everything. We did husband and wife Bible studies, we have read books together, did assigned Bible studies together, and attended Bible studies together. While I am sure these studies were fruitful, because God’s Word doesn’t return void, I also know none of these Bible studies for us carried on beyond the assigned material. In other words, studying scripture together didn’t become our practice. And you know what? NOT being in the word together became a predictable facet of our relationship. While we were always in the Word, we were separate. He did his thing in the Word, and I did mine and neither the two would meet. Oh, we might enter into the scriptures together after a Sunday sermon or if there was a specific life issue we were puzzling over, but to spend concerted time in the Word together was not a thing we did until we started Selah.
The Book of Ruth
Our first successful try was in the Selah Bible Study of the book of Ruth. I would have never predicted my farmer husband would join me in the fields outside of Bethlehem, but he did when I asked. Ruth has such a great example for husbands and wives and most of it takes place out in the fields of barley, which is a plus when your husband is a farmer.
That July, I had been asked to Facilitate a Selah Small Group for a group of women and asked him if he would work on the study with me, for eight weeks. It worked for him because it was during a slower season and harvest for us was months away. We each did our daily time in the Word-not together-but when it worked for us during the day. And, the amazing thing is we found ourselves discussing what we unearthed in our study over supper and as we spent time together. We couldn’t wait to share with each other what we discovered!
What I hadn’t anticipated is learning something new out about him. It was as if the framework of the Selah study gave me a new perspective into his heart. What he thought about spiritual things, how he views God, what his relationship with God looks like, and how he understands scripture.
Girls, this is where it gets exciting. This new insight is some exhilarating stuff girls!! I get to explore spiritual territory that we, as a couple, haven’t been to yet.
How about you? How are you and your husband doing with being in the Word together? Do you want to look at a new way of doing this?